When I was twelve years old we had a week of revival services at our church. The visiting preacher was Brother Gann. I listened to his sermons intently, night after night. As far back as I can remember, I always loved listening to preaching and hearing stories from the Bible. I knew about God, and I believed he existed. I read the Bible from time to time, but I didn’t really have a close relationship with God.
I went to church and to Sunday school, and I was in all the Christmas plays, but other than that, I didn’t really spend much time with God. I played outside with my sisters and went to school. I watched TV, listened to the radio, and my music collection, which was Country and Pop. That was basically my life at the time.
Close to the end of the week of meetings, Brother Gann took me into the Men’s bathroom and talked to me about salvation. He had me repeat a prayer, then asked if I felt like God had done anything for me. I was a very shy kid, and I was terrified of men, especially in a bathroom. I wanted to get out of there, and back to my grandmother, as fast as I could, so I told him what I thought he wanted to hear.
I didn’t feel like God had done anything for me or changed me in any way, but just to be done, and get out of there, I said, “I think so.” I was baptized, with several other people, that Sunday night, and became a member of that little church. As I stood there in the front of the church with my heart pounding, and my hair still wet, the congregation all came by to welcome the new members into the family, with hugs, and handshakes. But, nothing had really changed for me. I was no more saved than I had been a week earlier.
Four years later, I was further away from God than I had ever been. Oh, I still prayed, when I needed something, or when I was afraid, but, I had stopped reading the Bible, and I had stopped going to church. I was drinking, and doing drugs, and all the bad things that come with that lifestyle. I was still lost. I didn’t know Jesus at all. I knew myself, though. I knew I was lost. I knew what I was doing was wrong, and I hated myself for it. I hated who I was, and what I was. I was miserable inside. I hated everything about myself. I hated everything I did, and everything I thought. I tried to do good and be a good person, but no matter how hard I tried, it wasn’t enough. I was still the same miserable person inside.
Then, when I was nineteen, I started going back to church, but not where I was baptized seven years earlier. I was ashamed to face those people because many of them knew what kind of life I had been living, and I was afraid of what they might say to me.
In my new church, I began to learn more about God, and what he expects from us. I wanted to do right. I was sick of my life, and I was sick of myself. I started reading the Bible again. I started studying and comparing scriptures. I started to understand God and his love. I knew myself well, and I knew I didn’t deserve anything good, but I began to see that God loved me anyway. Me! The vilest sinner alive. Wow! Realizing that was so amazing. There are no words to describe it. I got to thinking, if he loves me so much that he would come to earth, suffer, and die in my place because he wanted me to be part of his family, and be with him forever, I should accept him as Lord of my life, and serve him. So I did.
I began to understand why Christians love him so much. I began to see how they could still serve him even when things are not perfect. I saw why Peter, Paul, and the other early Christians, and the reformers were all willing to die rather than denounce Jesus and his truth.
The awesome love that our creator has for us is beyond words. Even though we’re such sinners, and we reject him time and time again, he still loves us. When we come to understand the love he has for us, it causes us to love him. When we truly realize how wretched we are, and how vile, and sinful we truly are in God’s sight, and then to see the depth of love that he has for us anyway, it’s amazing. That’s why I love him. That’s why I serve him. That’s why I want others to know him. John said, “We love him because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19). He’s such a great God, and he wants to be with us and spend time with us.
Many people have been baptized and joined a church, but they’re still living just like the world. They’re not really following Jesus. Why not? It’s because they don’t know him. When you truly know him you can’t help but love him. Jesus said, “If you love me, keep my commandments“ (John 14:15).
If we love him we will WANT to keep his commandments. People have to experience God’s love before they can love him. I want the world to know that God is real and that he loves them beyond all human understanding. I want people to love Jesus, and obey him, and keep his commandments. That’s the main difference between those who follow Jesus and those who don’t. They don’t love him, so naturally, they don’t want to obey him. They don’t want him telling them how to live their lives. They don’t realize that he only wants what’s best for us and that he wants us all to be happy. They don’t know that obeying God will bring true happiness. God loves us. God is love, and spending time with him, and getting to know him, puts love in our hearts for him, and for others, as well.
That’s how his followers can love people that others might not; Those who have committed horrible, sinful acts. Those that society has labeled as “worthless” or “a lost cause.” That’s how we can forgive someone who has committed terrible acts against us, or people we love.
It’s not just because we know how bad those people are, or what they have been through. It’s that we know how bad WE are, and God loves us anyway. I like to think of it as seeing them through God’s eyes. He loves them with that same unconditional love he has for us, and he wants to save them as much as he wants to save us. It’s not always easy, though. We’re still human. The ability to love, and forgive can only come from God.
If we’re honest with ourselves, about ourselves, we will not judge others. If we truly see how sinful we are, we’ll realize that another person’s sins are no worse than our own. They may commit sins we might never imagine doing, but sin is sin, in God’s eyes. It’s important to understand that we would still be out there living just like the world if it wasn’t for the grace of God. That same grace is available to everyone, no matter how bad you are. No matter what you’ve ever done, God is willing to forgive you and save you.
So, if you don’t know Jesus, get to know him. He IS real. If you don’t believe, ask him to show you. If you’re sincere, he’ll reveal himself to you. Don’t be afraid. He loves you so much that he died for you. You can trust him with your life.
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